A day in the city.

[franceslievens]

"Salope!" That's what I hear when I ring my bicycle bell at the pedestrians walking in front of me on the bike lane. The word in itself doesn't faze me. I hear it often when irritating the boys in the 'hood. And irritate them, I do often. When I do not proceed through the gates at the underground station, to make sure they won't slip through without paying, I get the word hurled at my face. I laugh back at them.
But today it was different. It wasn't said in anger. The boy said it like an everyday word signifying woman. So that's what we are to a certain segment of city dwellers: "Des salopes, tous!" Women? No. We can be mothers or whores. Something else doesn't exist. Preferably we are locked away behind doors or veils. Ride a bike and telling someone off for their behaviour is not womanly. We should be like a girl, and being a girl is always worse than being the man.
They're only boys. I could be their teacher.

Comments

[iphi1.livejournal.com]

That's depressing and one of the main reasons I could never ever live in Brussels.

[frances-lievens.livejournal.com]

When I dare I tell them to stop it. Usually I shoot them daggers with my eyes. Where I live I've never encountered youth like these. They're concentrated around metro stations, and certain parts of Brussels. Unfortunately the good guys flee those parts, worsening the problem.

When you live here, you create an armour. There are things I fail to notice. When we came back from Oxford it had to get used to the bustle and noise of the city again. I also noticed how segregated the community in Oxford was. We lived in a "good" neighbourhood over there. In Brussels there is much more of a mix: immigrants, Belgians, poor people, rich people, all live next to each other. If only they'd live with each other we'd be a step further.

What I'm not looking forward to, is my girls having to take this crap when they're teenagers and they want to wear short skirts in Summer.

[sister-luck.livejournal.com]

Not entirely unrelated: Girl in Year 8 to her female friend quite matter-of-factly: Ey Fotze. While I was standing next to them, but it wasn't said to shock me. I call her on it: "Oh no, she knows I don't mean it in a bad way. She knows I'm her friend." I don't think this classifies as re-claiming or does it? Honestly, I don't know what it all signifies.

[frances-lievens.livejournal.com]

I don't teach secondary school, but I've heard them call each other "bitch". I believe it has nothing to do with reclaiming the word. It's used in exactly the same way they use it in the videos: to exert power over the other. They even identify with the bitches of the music videos. But they aren't all like this. It's a minority, albeit a very vocal one...

[sister-luck.livejournal.com]

It wasn't a power thing - it was completely casual. Like saying "Hey girl" - in actual fact Girl-Who-Said-The-C-Word doesn't quite have the same status as Girl-Who-Was-Called-The-C-Word. Maybe it was an attempt at sounding more ghetto - sometimes they go wannabe-gangsta.

[frances-lievens.livejournal.com]

But doesn't status equal power? I'm the one with the higher status so I can call you names and you won't tell? At least that was what I was trying to say.

[sister-luck.livejournal.com]

Yes, I get that and I'm sure that's how it often goes, but here lower-status-girl called higher-status-girl the C-word and it wasn't an attempt at a power grab. (At least it didn't seem so to me.) It was just a word. It seemed to have lost its power among them. It became powerful again when I reminded her that she certainly didn't want me to tell her mother that she is using this kind of language, so she should refrain from using it. (I did call her mother yesterday about her general behaviour and afterwards the girl asked me if I did tell her about it and she was very glad that I didn't mention it.)

[frances-lievens.livejournal.com]

Aha, like students yelling "Putain" when something goes wrong and having to remind them what the actual meaning is of that word. But they wouldn't use it casual though. It's always accompanied with anger.