Three rules on when to skip a meeting.

[franceslievens]

There comes a moment in your life when people invite you to a meeting, but they only do it so and so. "We're going to talk these things through then and there. Why don't you come?" Your moral highground feels compelled to join the others: They put so much effort and hard work in everything, whereas you just tag along for the ride. You want to be in on the action – and you want to quiet down the tiny guilt trip you go on because you don't put that much effort and hard work into the same thing. Here's a little rule of thumb to make sure you won't end up in a meeting you weren't seriously invited to: Don't go to a meeting when...

1. You're wondering whether to go or not, because no-one bothered to ask you in person if you would come.
   
2. You actualy have nothing of importance to say.
   
3. When you have something of importance to say, you aren't going to say it, because you can't quite spare the energy it takes to persuade others of your ideas.

Not following these rules will lead to boring evenings, and a chorus of "What am I doing here?" singing in your head.

Comments

[iphi1.livejournal.com]

You're looking at this all wrong.

The rules are:

1)Is there anything in it for me?
e.g. Are there going to be interesting network opportunities, will there be sth decided that directly involves me, etc.
Nobody should be expected to do sth out of the goodness of their heart. It is OK to be self-centered when it comes to work.

2)If you adhere to rule 1, you will always have sth important to say. Even if the topic of the meeting is not important, it is important that some people will recognize you as a "valuable contributer".

3)You should never not speak at a meeting. Even saying sth incredibly stupid will leave a better impressing than not saying anything at all. Once you get the label "not pro-active" you might as well be dead. As for the energy thing, see rule 1. Make it apply to you and your situation, and you will find the energy.

If there's nothing in it for you, then screw it!!! If there is sth in it for you, you GO even if you're NOT invited.
Such are the rules in business... now I'll shut up. You are of course allowed a totally different opinion :)

[frances-lievens.livejournal.com]

Hmm, well my rule #2 implied that having sth of importance to say means there is sth in it for you.

Since I was in the meeting, I did adhere to your rules #2 and #3: I said things, not very valuable, but at least they noticed I was there! I can't keep my mouth shut, anyways. *g*

But still, I think I forgot all about your rule #1: there wasn't really anything in it for me. Or I should have thought about that first. Your rules are a bit more obvious than mine, I guess. Do they apply in teaching settings as well? I really should think about that...